


I'm Still Afraid Of Everything

by agirlnamedtruth



Category: Dirty Dancing (1987)
Genre: F/M, Gen, POV First Person, Vignette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-02
Updated: 2012-08-02
Packaged: 2017-11-11 07:02:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/475855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/agirlnamedtruth/pseuds/agirlnamedtruth
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Baby is still afraid but now all the fears are worth it. Baby's P.O.V</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Still Afraid Of Everything

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the prompts _Quote: "There was always a minority afraid of something, and a great majority afraid of the dark, afraid of the future, afraid of the past, afraid of the present, afraid of themselves and shadows of themselves." Ray Bradbury (Usher II)_ and 1st person narrative for [Writerverse](http://writerverse.livejournal.com)'s Table Of Doom.

When I snuck back in it was daylight and had been for a while. My parents had gone out, my sister too. Or so I thought. I crept through the door and it closed behind me, seemingly independently.

“Where have you been?” Lisa said, dramatically stepping out from behind the door.

“I...” I started but nothing came to mind.

“You were with that dancer, weren’t you?”

“No.” I denied it, cursing the fact I was a terrible liar.

“You were! Oh my...” She stopped herself before she blasphemed; Daddy had brought them up better than that. “Did you do it?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I denied again but the color rising in my cheeks must have betrayed me.

“You did! Oh, you have to tell me everything! Was it good? Did it hurt? Were you scared?” Lisa fired off questions, barely stopping to breathe, let alone let me answer them.

“A good girl doesn’t talk about it.” I said shrewdly.

“A good girl doesn’t do it!” She said, playfully hitting my arm. She must have picked up on the fact I didn’t want to talk about it though because she turned serious. “Ok, well if you change your mind...” She trailed off, letting the rest go unsaid.

“Thanks, Lisa. Will you cover for me? I can’t think of a single excuse.” I asked her, knowing she would come through for me.

“Of course!” She said and walked out of the room, dancing slightly, hopping from foot to foot. She was more excited than I was.

I sat down on the bed; it had been her last question that shook me. _Had I been scared?_

It was strange, last night I had thought I was scared of everything. I had been afraid of the future, afraid of the past, afraid of the present, afraid of myself. But now, those fears were shadows. They had melted away in the moment. Some of them seemed silly now. Some of them still threatened to come back. 

I suppose I should have new fears building now, like what if Lisa told and what if my parents found out? What if I ended up with a baby myself? What if come next time I see him, Johnny has moved on, forgotten me? What if I was just some fling? What if I wasn’t and he truly loves me and I truly love him? Will I still be able to leave at the end of summer? Will I have a choice? Would he quit his job for me, would I leave my family and put aside my dreams for him?

I put my hands to my head to try and block out all the questions, all the fears. Was this what it was like being a grown up and having grown up relationships? Was this worth it for last night?

My head cleared and I knew I had to go back to him. Of course it was worth it. How could I even question it? There was still that one fear that spoke louder than them all; I was still scared of walking out of his room and never feeling the rest of my whole life the way I feel when I'm with him.


End file.
